Sexuality As Shame in Marriage: Resentments Among Turkish Middle-Class Divorcées
This presentation focuses on the narratives of five Turkish professional middle-class divorcées who married in the 1980s, highlighting their experiences and struggles with sexuality in marriage. Drawing on in-depth interviews conducted with 53 divorcées of various ages and backgrounds across three major Turkish cities in 2015-2016, the study reveals a lack of informed expectations regarding sexuality in marital relationships. The participants' stories emphasize broader moral issues of inequality in marriage, particularly concerning women's sexuality. Most women recounted that their husbands were their first sexual partners, while the majority of the husbands had sexual experiences prior to marriage. Utilizing Gagnon and Simon’s (2005) sexual script theory for analysis, the research uncovers how female sexuality is intertwined with feelings of shame, often framed within the contexts of family and reproduction. The divorcées describe themselves as a "transitional generation," reflecting on their experiences in relation to both their mothers and their daughters. The stigma surrounding female sexuality in Turkish culture has led to their sexual alienation within marriage and served as a critical factor in their decisions to divorce. This analysis situates the women’s resentment within the cultural dichotomy of honor as a male trait and shame as a female one, highlighting how societal constructions of sexuality privilege men, ultimately contributing to the women’s marital dissatisfaction and divorce. The five narratives are analyzed considering research findings on family structure in Turkey, which suggest that most Turkish couples view their marriages as a blend of self-choice and their families’ involvement.
Middle-Class Turkish Divorcées
Gendered Expectations in Marriage
Sexual Script of Honor and Shame
Transitional Generation Narratives