Negotiating the Tuxedo Wedding: The Division of Wedding Labor for Men in Same-Sex and Straight Marriages
To answer this question, we draw on in-depth interviews with 23 men who participated in same-sex weddings and 23 men who participated in straight weddings. We find that negotiating the tuxedo wedding is a complex process shaped by men’s social location and gender ideologies. Confirming previous research on straight couples, we find that heterosexual men generally rely on the bride to do emotional kinship labor and organize the big day. For same-sex couples, we find that gender ideology connects to power dynamics within the relationship, meaning that wedding labor falls on the shoulders of men who perform marginalized masculinities. We analyze what these findings mean for understanding the relationship between gender, race, class, and heteronormativity.